Angry Lurker Honest Movie Review 103: The Girl with all the Gifts (3 STARS)

Another zombie movie, I'm a little bored with zombie movies these days, well never fear in this one they are called "hungries", a fungal infection zombie movie, the story set 20 years after the outbreak on a British outpost manned by military/scientists, experimenting on zombie children who have not yet descended too far into the zombie infection, outpost is then breached, journey to find safety, etc.....

Melanie who is our zombie girl/star and does steal the show ahead of everyone else ( even Gemma Arterton), the movie follows a predictable story line except for certain ideas like our smell (big issue), the fungus and maybe the ending (bloody fungus)......

Paddy Considine plays a world weary British army sergeant..........

Glenn Close plays rabid scientist trying to save humanity......

All in all worth a watch if you like the genre, based on a 2014 book by M.R Carey!

A fungus is a eukaryote that digests food externally and absorbs nutrients directly through its cell walls. Most fungi reproduce by spores and have a body (thallus) composed of microscopic tubular cells called hyphae. Fungi are heterotrophs and, like animals, obtain their carbon and energy from other organisms.

Angry Lurker Honest Movie Review 101: Kick-Ass 2 (3 STARS)

"If you liked the first one you'll probably like this one"- The Angry Lurker

Kick Ass has inspired lots of people young and old to don their costumes, make up cool names and patrol the streets as vigilantes (some are better than others), Hit Girl now older is having normal teenager problems with high school, foster dad and hormones, Red Mist who is very funny and over the top and is now back with a new name (The Motherfecker and that's the clean version) and a new gang ( ......of who Mother Russia is a member and the highlight of the movie) and an insane need to feck Kick Ass up! There are plenty of famous and not so famous faces to be seen and some quite briefly, some laugh out moments (diarrhea and vomiting at the same time scene is an eye opener and my mate Vinnie nearly choked with laughter, he's such a child), good violence (not too over top or gory (most of the time)........

...............it eventually leads up to a massive confrontation/fight between the Justice Forever superheroes and The Toxic Mega C..... superheroes(I can't print the word but you get the idea I hope or don't) and if you see it at the movies make sure you stay during the credits for another scene!

Worth a watch, pure popcorn...............

Mother Russia, all woman........

Also seen "Only God Forgives" and can't bring myself to review it at the moment........all because of Jim's Fear review and my total opposite view, awful, awful, awful...........awful.......arse water by a long way but maybe it's just me!

Angry Lurker Honest Movie Review 98: Olympus Has Fallen 2013 (3 STARS).

"I don't mind any flag waving in a movie, if you're proud of your country what's the problem but Independence Day did push the boundaries though!"

A Secret Service agent formerly in the Presidential protection detail but now sits behind a desk in the Treasury gets involved when the White House is breached by North Korean terrorists and the President and most of his cabinet are taken hostage, it's up to our hero (Gerard Butler) to save the day, save the kid and kick ass!

This movie has had several other movies referred to it such as Die Hard in the White House, Under Siege in the White House etc.....and I believe at one stage that Gerard Butler put his own money into the movie as the budget was been slashed as it went on.......

..........now this movie has some great scenes and ideas for wargamers, it's current with North and South Korea being involved, the action is very good, great effects, good cast (Morgan Freeman, Aaron Eckhart, Angela Bassett, Dylan McDermott, Rick Yune) but it's a little implausible (a few plot holes maybe) with Americas current security standing that the North Korean terrorists would get this far into the heart of America in such numbers (especially a gunship but what do I know), several people have whined about thequality of the Secret Service and the level of patriotism and flag waving, it's an attack on the nation, an attack on the White House what do you expect, it's not that much in your face and I didn't see that much of a problem with any of it......... 

.....what this is is very entertaining, Butler is a ruthless git and goes through the terrorists like faeces through a goose, a popcorn movie of the highest order!

By the way that lunatic great guy and Reject Seb is now on day 4 of his giveaways, go over there and try and win yourself some good free stuff!

Angry Lurker Honest Movie Review 95: G.I Joe Retaliation 2013 (3 STARS).

Framed for crimes against the country, the G.I. Joe team is terminated by the President's order, and the surviving team members face off against Zartan, his accomplices, and the world leaders he has under his influence.

You do sort of need to have seen the first one and technically this is better than the first one but I'm not sure and I'd like to say this was not my first choice of movie when I arrived at the cinema, there's a few missing characters from the first (glossed over), some being played by new people and a returning one killed off quite quickly, the action is quite fast and quick, the acting is not too bad, the Rock (Dwayne Johnson) is perfect in his role, Bruce Willis must have a tax bill to pay and physics and reality gets a real test. Harmless popcorn but maybe wait for DVD.

There are a lot of changes from the comics in these movies and I would have liked to have seen some Red Shadows and a Baron Ironblood in my movies but that's just me, in Britain you would be more familiar with the name Action Force.

I really do like when sports people move over to acting like the Rock, Vinnie Jones and have a little or a lot of success..........

Some of the cast, Jonathan Pryce does look a little bemused but he plays a good role........

Angry Lurker Honest Movie Review 94: A Good Day To Die Hard 2013 (3 STARS).

"It wasn't that good a day, luckily Willis was in it!"

Iconoclastic, take-no-prisoners cop John McClane, for the first time, finds himself on foreign soil after travelling to Moscow to help his wayward son Jack - unaware that Jack is really a highly-trained CIA operative out to stop a nuclear weapons heist. With the Russian underworld in pursuit, and battling a countdown to war, the two McClanes discover that their opposing methods make them unstoppable heroes.

This movie had me worried and not just by some reviews but also that the certificate was 12A (anyone under twelve could see this as long as an adult was with them) and this affected the action, language and claret...a lot!

John McClane's son is in trouble in Russia and is up for some serious sentencing, so John whisks over there quite sharpish and within minutes we are up to our necks in explosions, mobsters, car chases, helicopter gunships, backstabbing, uranium, CIA and bullshit!

Now some of the action scenes are quite good, some good father/son one liners and quips but everything is toned down because of the certificate, the script is a little over the fecking top, Willis looks too old for this shit now, some shenanigans and hardly a mark on him, me and I would be in traction for 2 months. The last movie pushed the believability stakes a little but this one kicks them in the crackers.

Entertaining but a popcorn movie without the butter, 3 STARS but by the skin of it's Russian teeth!

Another Reject highlight tomorrow!

Angry Lurker Honest Movie Review 90: Cockneys vs Zombies 2012 (3 STARS).

"The Undead are Brown Bread"....what more can you say?

The term Cockney has geographical, cultural and linguistic associations. Traditionally, it refers to people born within a certain area, that is covered "by the sound of bow bells" (St.Mary-Le-Bow church). Geographically and culturally, it is often used to refer to working class Londoners, particularly those in the East end. Linguistically, it can refer to the accent and English spoken by this group.

A group of slightly inept bank robbers plan a bank robbery to save their grandfathers retirement home but in the meantime a crypt is found in an old graveyard and opened by a construction company and the undead are released. They need to get to the retirement home before the zombies do, cue zombie shenanigans!

This is a low budget, fun zombie movie with good and bad special effects but also good performances from the leads (Alan Ford, Michelle Ryan etc...), over the top at times including the cockney dialogue, well worth a watch though!

The highlight was watching Millwall football zombie supporters attacking West Ham zombie supporters....brilliant! (I hope it was those teams?)

Angry Lurker Honest Movie Review 89: Skyfall 2012 (3 STARS).

M is in trouble both from within her government and from her past and revenge has reared it's ugly head, Bond is dead and loyalties are tested.

I deliberated on whether this movie warranted 4 STARS or the 3 I gave it, Craig is still great as Bond playing damaged and dangerous with gusto, Mrs Dench is still ruthless, there's new bond girls, a new Q but my main problem was the bad guy (Javier Bardem, great actor especially in No Country for Old Men)) was miscast, not that the last two bond movie bad guys were any better but they belonged or were associated with an organisation that gave them some credence, although the movie does say that the new threat to countries comes from the shadows are are no longer countries(very true).

The plot which is revenge driven (as you know a favourite plot line of mine in any movie) doesn't work for me, overly elaborate and badly executed by the bad guy (unforgivable), M is the main focus of the story and Bond's struggle to protect her and also we get a glimpse into his past and the title of the movie (which is seemingly not based on any of Fleming's work).

It's well worth the watch and maybe I need to see it again, other factors may not have helped like 3rd row from the front of the screen (my retinas were a little blurred by the time the ads and trailers were over), the action was okay but disjointed at times but my main problem was Bardem and the blond hair.

Don't want to give the any more of the plot or ending away but Bond/Craig is as good as ever!  

Angry Lurker Honest Movie Review 88: Taken 2 ( 3 STARS).

"If you liked the first one you'll like this but........ "Angry Lurker Honest Movie Review.

..........and the but was the major problem because the first movies rating was a 15 and this is a 12A (so kids under 12 can see it but have to be accompanied by an adult), this meant virtually no blood, no sound when necks were twisted the wrong way and their were a few, there was a decent body count as well but it still felt diluted or dumbed down.

The story follows the families of the bad guys from the original movie trying to exact revenge on our hero and his ex-wife (having more marriage problems) and daughter while on holiday in Istanbul, the kidnappings are put in action with Neeson and his ex-wife captured and the daughter on the run, what follows is over the top, a little far fetched but entertaining because Neeson does more of the same again with ruthless efficiency......

.......but the rating issue and subsequent dumbing down of the violence annoyed me but still worth a watch!

A rating system I once heard.....

A 12 certificate : The hero gets the girl.

     A 15 certificate: The bad guy gets the girl.

   A 18 certificate: Everybody gets the girl.

Angry Lurker Honest Movie Review 87: Looper 2012 (3 STARS)

In 2074, when the mob wants to get rid of someone, the target is sent 30 years into the past, where a hired gun awaits. Someone like Joe, who one day learns the mob wants to 'close the loop' by transporting back Joe's future self.

This is a good time travel movie featuring a young assassin/Looper (Levitt who had his appearance altered to look more like a young Willis, freaked me out for a while until I realised) and his older self (Willis, still doing quality work) and their paths cross when the Looper tries to kill his older self but his older self is having none of it and has come back in time to stop a future killer by killing the killer's younger self.

It's a story of the future and past clashing and knowing what's going to happen but still not being able to stop it and the end can only go one way, it's a movie that has you thinking a lot about what will happen, who the target is and what both Loopers will do to change or keep the future the same, good performances from everyone including Emily Blunt and Jeff Daniels but the kid Cid (Pierce Gagnon) was a great find and has a great future in the industry.

Good story, good performances, good action (not a lot of it but that was fine with me for once), well worth a watch!

Angry Lurker Honest Movie Review 86: Lawless 2012 (3 STARS).

A movie based on a true story about a trio of brothers who sold moonshine in Franklin County, Virginia and their battle against the corrupt authorities during the prohibition period of the United States.

Watched this as part of a double bill of movies I saw on the same day, I sometimes do this when I have a spare day and there's two movies worth seeing! Around the late 20's the Bondurant brothers run moonshine quite successfully during the prohibition period and things are running fine until a corrupt politician wants a share and sends a psychotic special deputy (Guy Pearce playing psycho very well), what follows is a steady rise in intimidation and violence from both sides that heads for a dramatic conclusion and showdown.

Tom Hardy is excellent as Forrest Bondurant, Shia LaBeouf is the young brother with dreams to rival Capone, Gary Oldman has a few brief appearances as a big time villain, in fact all the performances are good, the pace of the movie is quite slow at times and then you're hit with a moment of violence and the pace slows again, not as good as I thought it would be but well worth a watch!

Taking some annual leave and may not be around as much for a week or so!

Angry Lurker Honest Movie Review 84: Total Recall 2012 (3 STARS).

"Not a bad movie but an unnecessary remake?"-Angry Lurker Honest Movie Review!

For a factory worker named Douglas Quaid, even though he's got a beautiful wife who he loves, the mind-trip sounds like the perfect vacation from his frustrating life - real memories of life as a super-spy might be just what he needs. But when the procedure goes horribly wrong, Quaid becomes a hunted man as he finds himself on the run from the police.

This movie follows the plot of the original but none of it's locations, Earth has literally died due to chemical warfare and only two locations exist, the UFB (United Federation of Britain) and the colony (Australia) and are linked by a subterranean passage.

All the characters are still there except that Sharon Stones and Michaels Ironsides characters from the original are melded into one in as Kate Beckinsale (she's a little over the top but still very good though), the action is very good, the CGI is quite amazing as you believe the remaining parts of the world are overcrowded and that technology has advanced, the synthetic police units are incredible (part of the plot line), you still have finding the resistance leader element , Colin Farrell is very good in the lead role but why not use all this for a different type of sci-fi movie because you know certain things are going to happen well before they do and they take away from the experience a little...

Now I've seen the original lately and it's quite dated but when it came out it was a good movie for it's time but this is a different beast with today's movie technology, it's a mixture of Minority Report, I,Robot, Blade Runner and even the new Star Wars movies and obviously the original (there's even a 3 breasts scene!) but worth the watch...

Angry Lurker Honest Movie Review 83: The Bourne Legacy 2012 (3 STARS)

"Not bad, worth a watch for the leads and the action"- Angry Lurker Honest Movie Review.......

Technically the 4th instalment of the Bourne series and there is a lot of references to the last movie and to characters from that movie (original footage is used) and some of them briefly appear as cameos helping the story along, there is now a newer program but assets are now drug dependent (probably so there's no more Jason Bourne problems) but a problem develops and the programme is terminated along with assets and support personnel but our hero (Renner) and support weenie (Weisz) survive and go on the run looking for answers especially to the drug dependency problem....

The movie starts off slowly but not a problem as we're learning a lot about the programme and the characters, the bad guys (government weenies) are well played by Edward Norton and Stacy Keach, the action set pieces are well done, the story or plot is a little plodding at times but I think they expect more movies to come and the ability to develop the stories.........

I liked the movie and left the cinema with a feeling of okay that wasn't bad and I would watch it again, so a popcorn movie with good work from Weisz and Renner but the story did need them! I hope there's more but I don't know....worth a watch though even with the ending catching me like a kick in the crackers.

Angry Lurker Honest Movie Review 82: Expendables 2 (3 Stars).

"Ridiculous but Enjoyable!"- The Angry Lurker Honest Movie Review.

The boys are back again for more over the top shenanigans, revenge and bring a few extra friends along for the ride as Mr Church (Willis) arranges a mission that goes wrong and sets the boys and a girl on a mission to find a bad guy and some plutonium.

So the review and take a deep breath......

Explosions, lots and lots of bad guys, airplane, screaming, shooting, Schwarzenegger, escape, humour, sadness, woman, revenge, Van Damme, lots and lots of bad guys, explosions, last meal, Chuck Norris, villagers, plutonium, chase, lots and lots more bad guys, more shooting, more explosions, airport, Smart car scene, Willis, Schwarzenegger, more Norris, explosions, more screaming, knuckle dusters, knifes and Van Damme vs Stallone, humour etc.......

If you liked the first one you'll like this!

Angry Lurker Honest Movie Review 80: Seeking A Friend for the end of the World 2012 (3 STARS).

...what would do with 21 days before all life ended?

An asteroid named "Matilda" is on a collision course with Earth and in 21 days it will collide with and end all life, everything that could be done has been done and failed and now the world must prepare for the end. What would you do if your life and the world were doomed? One man decides to spend his time searching for a  long lost love from high school (his wife has left him in the panic) during the upcoming apocalypse but not alone.......

This is a thinly veiled chick flick but the story of 21 days left for the world and what would you do intrigued me, some of the choices made my by some of the people amazed and dismayed me, it's a road movie, it's quite funny in places, it's a small story within the story of the world, there is rioting but it's just a scene setter for the rest of the movie.

The real story is between Steve Carell and Keira Knightley as they journey to the long lost love, they meet some great, absurd, annoying characters along the way, now these two are not my most favourite actors in the world but they perform well and didn't irritate me that much, a strange story with little shown about what real events would transpire as the world imploded, I didn't see it going this way myself but then I'm just a cynic......

.......I don't want to give away too much but it's worth a watch though but I would have gone another way with my 21 days!.

Angry Lurker Honest Movie Review 79: Killer Joe 2012 (3 STARS?)

A son in debt to the local kingpin decides with his family's help to bump off his mother and his dads ex-wife for the insurance money and use local detective and killer for hire Joe Cooper to do the deed but they don't have his fee until the insurance clears, so the young daughter Dottie is used as collateral until the fee is paid, cue the weirdest, slightly unsettling strangest movie I've seen in quite a long time.......

.....did I mention the chicken drumstick fellatio scene!

Matthew McConaughey is quire brilliant as Killer Joe, menacing and "eyes that hurt" one moment and scene eating the next, the trailer park dog that barks at everyone except Joe! The collateral scene between Joe and Dottie is unsettling as is the chicken drumstick scene but this train wreck of a movie saves the best or worst for last with the ending and confusion.

I still don't know how I feel about this movie, it's dumb (the family are awful dumb and backstabbing shits), funny in places, the violence is a little over the top, the performances from the cast are great especially Gershorn (I swear the woman has a nudity clause) and Church (plays dumb well), nudity but unsettling should you be watching this nudity?

The ending still has me annoyed and unclear but I'm glad I've seen it but probably never again, Friedkin I think was pulling my chain!

Angry Lurker Honest Movie Review 78: Prometheus 2012 (3 STARS)

...I finally decided to go see this much talked about Alien prequel.

A group of scientists funded by the Weyland Group travel to far ends of the galaxy to find their creators on a planet by deciphering cave drawings spanning thousands of years on Earth, what they discover is that they are doomed and possibly mankind as well.

This movie is visually stunning, I mean beautifully stunning, a good performance from Michael Fassbender but it is one of the most fucking all over the bloody place, plot hole ridden, of course it's a bloody prequel, don't care about most characters, scientifically retarded, so many questions, WTF? moments movie I've seen in quite a while....and that's why it got 3 STARS because I've discussed this movie with so many friends and the great heated arguments and questions that have ensued justified the rating and very, very few movies have annoyed and delighted me in such a long time...

.....is it worth a watch...yes...just so you can discuss how much it pissed you off or what was that about with friends.

Bring on the Prometheus 2!!!!!!!!!

Angry Lurker Honest Movie Review 77: Quarantine 2 ( 3 STARS).

The sequel to Quarantine which was a remake of REC but not a remake of REC 2!

A plane is taken over by a mysterious virus and when the plane lands it is placed under quarantine. Now the passengers must band together to survive the quarantine and the virus!

I don't know whether this is much of a sequel as it does use the virus story and the apartment link to the first movie but little else...except for the fast zombies!

I don't want to give much away but it's more like a B movie but an okay B movie, it had a small budget but they've done well with it , REC 2 which is the Spanish sequel version would have been a better idea to remake but you can't have everything.

There's no one I really knew in the cast but the virus spreads quickly from one passenger to the next quickly and ruthlessly, you get to meet the passengers and crew and pick your favourites and who will get it first, the initial build up is slow but when things start to go wrong things get very quick and bloody, the effects aren't too bad, neither is the acting and while it just scrapes the 3 STARS (guide at the bottom of page) it will pass an evening and a bucket of popcorn quite easily.

Angry Lurker Honest Movie Review 76: Super 8 2011 (3 STARS).

Got to see this but was unaware it was more of a kids/teenager movie but I had already bought the popcorn....

In the summer of 1979, a group of friends in a small Ohio town witness a catastrophic train crash while making a super 8 movie (with zombies) and soon suspect it was not an accident. Shortly after, unusual disapearances and inexplicable events begin to take place in the town, and the local deputy and the friends try to uncover the truth-something more terrifying than any of them could have imagined.

I really knew little of this movie other than some sort of alien on earth movie and it was seen through the eyes of a group of friends making a movie set in the late seventies, it's a mixture of other movies like The Goonies, E.T., The Explorers etc......

It's well done and the period of time is well created, there are a few actors you will just about know but great performances from everyone especially the friends, the military are overbearing, aggressive and secretive while trying to deal with the situation (no surprise there!), the effects are good, the creatures are good, there's a little too much back story about loss and forgiveness but I got over it.

It's worth a watch but to me only once though! 

Angry Lurker Honest Movie Review 75: Mission Impossible-Ghost Protocol (3 STARS).

Mission Impossible : Ghost Protocol and fourth in the series.......

The IMF is shut down after being implicated in the bombing of the Kremlin and Ethan Hunt and his new team go rogue to clear his organisations name and save the world from nuclear war.

For the most part I like Tom Cruise and his movies, this is no exception as it ticks all the boxes for action and humour, there's a new team (Simon Pegg is now a field agent) and Jeremy Renner (not bad) and Paula Patton (ok) are new but Simon provides the humour with the banter between him and Cruise. They are after a madman who wants to start a war between Russia and America and it does go down to the wire.

The opening sequence is very clever and well done (always liked Dean Martins "Ain't that a kick in the head") and that's what the movie is, it's a stunning set of action sequences switching from different parts of the globe where they end up with impossible situations (i know that's what they do but....) that are more demanding than the last with assassin's, Russian's, dodgy equipment and bad guys fecking it up even more and there's the little hiccup....

......the movie is a little over the top with some of the action set pieces and I found it just a bit too long but worth anybody's Saturday night with a big bag of popcorn!

Angry Lurker Honest Movie Review 73: Colombiana 2011 (3 Stars).

A young woman grows up to be a stone cold assassin after witnessing her parents murder as a child in Bogota. She trains and works for her uncle as a hitman by day, but her personal time is spent engaging in vigilante murders that she hopes will lead her to her ultimate target, the monster responsible for her parents death!

The movie starts with Cataleya's (Zoe Saldana, not bad at all) parents who are part of a drug cartel trying to retire from said cartel but this news is not taken well by cartel boss and Cataleya (10 at this stage) is soon running for her life and through some dubious shenanigans ends up with her criminal uncle in America.

Fast forward to adult life.....

This is a movie about revenge and it's not a bad one but at times it's a little far fetched, there is good inventive action, some co-stars who you will recognise (maybe) and help the story along but this is about her quest for revenge and not even a love life will get in the way but suspend a little disbelief and you have a popcorn movie for a Saturday night with a loved one or the missus!

Screenplay was written by Luc Besson!